True Lies

In one episode of Grey's Anatomy, a man suffering from a brain tumor was admitted into the hospital for surgery. One of the effects of the tumor was his inability to filter his thoughts and his words. He says what he thinks and only apologizes if someone tells him that he is being rude.

Is telling the truth all the time akin to being rude ? Imagine if that was you. Not only would you not have any secrets left, you probably wouldn't have any friends either.

I might agree with the case above because it's quite rude if someone telling me the truth which is telling something I want to deny, to refuse... (although at the same time I demand for the truth itself, phuuuih... confusing !)
There are circumstances that I want other people lie to me as I lie to them as feeling consideration, although sometimes lie or telling the truth could ruin the relationship or else just like the article said,

"In all fairness, no one has any right to suggest such a thing (lie or tell the truth) unless they have the whole story. And yet, more often than not, we let the people closest to us get away with it. Which explains why another study which found that partners who idealized each other are more likely to be satisfied with their relationship and stay together. They hide the painful truth.

In such cases, we're lying to ourselves. We have been conditioned to believe that the feelings of those around us are more important than our feeling. Tell other the truth but in no circumstances should you reveal feelings that will hurt others, we've been told. Don't show your anger, don't cry. So we live in a state of denial, telling ourselves we're happy when we're not. Smiling when what we really want to do is curl up under the covers and cry out our eyes out.

Perhaps it's time to rethink the stance truth has held in the course of history. It's time to be honest with yourself. That's far more important to your wellbeing than always telling others the truth. Some might call it being selfish but if you're not looking out for yourself, who is ? Besides, are you sure everyone wants to know the truth all the time ?

Confession, some say, is good for the soul. But is it really ? Letting go of the things that plague you might make you feel lighter but the person on the receiving end might not. Would we really want to know the truth all the time ? Do we really want to know what others are thinking ?

Sometimes, it's better to live in ignorance than to be stabbed by the truth, as long as we're always honest with ourselves"

Well... I got the picture now. It's not about the truth or the lie, it's about being honest to yourself. In the end I just thought, why I should stay in the relationship when it makes me more hurt and uncomfortable with my own life.


article by HER WORLD MAGAZINE Nov 2008 (The Truth Is...)
picture by blog.flickr.net